Simple…

I definitely kept it simple today. I didn’t really do much outside of what I really needed to do. Just a day of rest to allow myself to sit in some things. I still struggle with allowing myself to do nothing in peace, but I’m getting better at it.

I found myself thinking about how many things are simple, but as humans we complicate them. We act as if we cannot help what we do, but the reality is that people aren’t nearly as pressed about what is not done. It is what people do that becomes a problem and anybody professing to have no self control is a dangerous person. We hear the excuses that people make and how often people try to make 1 + 1 = orange. I saw people saying in response to a highly publicized infidelity, “That’s why you don’t let your friends come around your man.” That kind of thought process really turns my stomach. I can assure you that any of my friend’s men are safe with me. I’m not a scumbag. It is not simply some switch that flips because people are put in certain situations. Regardless of what opportunities are presented your morals should kick in. 

You’re already not supposed to be cheating, but out of all of the people in the world for you to choose you select someone close to your spouse, you’re a terrible person. There is no if, ands, or buts about it. This isn’t about anything else and it truly disgusts me the excuses that people make for terrible behavior. It is not just them being a man or whatever people put out to act like the people involved aren’t responsible, it is a choice to do something incredibly wrong and harmful. I have returned so many cell phones and wallets. I have had opportunities to take things for people and probably could have gotten away with it. I was once unfortunately in a situation with a married man unbeknownst to me. As soon as I found out it was a chop. You do not have to be perfect to be a decent human beings and we need to stop acting like people who do terrible things are some kind of victim of circumstance. People make choices. To lie. To blatantly disregard their promises. To engage in harm. Instead of constantly trying to act as if it’s just a thing humans do, we need to hold people accountable for the decisions they make because that is an expression of who they are. If you are somebody who cannot control yourself, that is a problem that needs to be addressed. There is no version of events where people should simply accept horrible behaviors as if adults are not fully capable of deciding what they do and do not do. 

It particularly bothers me when people enable those in positions to be leaders and models to engage in terrible behaviors and do not question them because of their titles or roles. I will never be able to understand people who attend churches with pastors who continuously engage in sin. No, you don’t get to act as if you’re only human. What kind of faith can a person of God claim to have when they allow the world to entice them away from God’s grace and promise? If you truly believe in God you should believe that following the word of God is what will get you everything you need and want. Being susceptible to sin more than slightly suggests that you do not believe in the power of God to bless you when you remain discipline and in keeping with the decrees of the Lord. I would never let a person still battling with sin lead me anywhere. You’re trying to get to heaven, but you’re being sheparded by people who are not even guaranteed to go. What people don’t seem to understand about seeking forgiveness is that it is not about apologies and crocodile tears. If you believe the truth of your heart to be known then you should know that there is no fooling the two that you would need to: yourself and your maker. But I have seen the limits and suppositions of faith that many religious people engage in and I believe that is why many of the worst people you know go to church. It is about presenting as good or putting yourself “under the blood” to avoid consequence and accountability. Those people are not seeking to be what they believe God wants them to be, they are just using the Lord’s name in vain. That is not about saying goddamn, it is about claiming to be a follower of God when in truth you are not. As I’ve stated before I am not religious, but knowing the principles that are supposed to be a part of these religions will show the many hypocrites that misrepresent. That’s why you can seek help from a church and be turned away. Those people are using God as a shield from actual good and decency so much of the time that it is sickening.

People see what goes on and they see what people do. Yet time and again people are not held accountable or worse, the person held accountable is the person who has suffered them and not the perpetrator. People are more critical of women who suffer abuse than the men carrying out the abuse. People turn up their noses at women who are continuously getting cheated on and not the man doing the cheating. Further seeking to punish somebody already suffering because you think that is their job not to be hurt and not the person’s job not to hurt them speaks so much about how the world works. So many things are normalized and made acceptable that are heinous. Meanwhile, people act as if they don’t understand why these things keep happening. That is because we are not truly a part of communities that look out for each other. So many people judge, but also many people maintain environments that enable poor behaviors so that they can get away with their own. People who hold themselves and others to higher standards are called naive or goody two shoes. Whole time I’m just trying to be a good person who lives a principled life. I hold myself accountable when I misbehave and I do not continuously give myself permission to do what I know I shouldn’t.

These are the matters of life that we must navigate as we move about the world. So many systems of belief and behavior are so incredibly harmful and yet in calling out a lot of this stuff there is so much pushback. It turns my stomach, but I try not to let it make me give up. I will keep pushing for better and not allow people around me who feel that it’s okay to be harmful or selfish because they do want to have to take the responsibility or do the work of being better. We all should strive to be people we can be proud of and honor ourselves with good behavior. But looking around we almost feel pressured to engage in things and go along with things that we know are not right. I’ll keep thinking and try to stick to the simple law of doing onto others and being the good that I want to see. Until tomorrow, I hope you find some way to be better. It really can be so simple…